Robert Ashton Unlimited!

Smoke gets in my eyes

2012-01-02T09:04:00.002Z

Had he not died 30yrs ago, today would have been my late father's 85th birthday. I often wonder why I remember his birthday so easily and my mother's simply passes each year unremembered. (She died two years earlier).

I guess it's the time of year. The melancholy that accompanies the dawning of a new year. The cold weather and a time when work takes second place to life, inevitably leads me to contemplate death.

My father was not a happy man. He struggled with his demons and as he grew older, the demons began to win. He'd shut himself away, play Bach sonatas on his piano and drink. I think at the end he was consuming at least a bottle of Bells whisky a day, but this did not seem to salve his pain.

Finally he had the death we all hope for. He got out of bed one morning, took five paces, had a heart attack and was dead when he hit the floor. A shock for him and a relief for me, my brother and sister.

As time passes, the memory of my parents inevitably fades. My helpful mother in law sometimes says; 'I wonder what your parents would make of your life now?' Rather than rekindle memories this simply reminds me of the distance I have travelled since they died.

I do benchmark the relationship I have with my kids with that I did not enjoy with my own parents. There is no comparison. We are all very different and thank goodness, far happier with each other. I have huge respect for my now adult children and all their achieve; I think that respect is mutual, although of course masked by the usual cheeky banter you get from your kids.

The photo, is of Ipswich Crematorium. It's where both parents and one grandparent were dispatched. I've never been there and doubt I ever will. I've always avoided committals and was not there when either parent slid from chapel to cremator. Perhaps that's why each new year I remember. Perhaps next time I go to a family funeral I need to let the smoke get in my eyes.

Out with the old and in with . . . . .

2011-12-12T08:36:00.000Z

Heck, I've not blogged for months - not here anyway. Let's change that right now. This 'Unlimited' blog has never been for the faint hearted. Or those that might be put off by the exposures and expositions it contains.

I'll be here at least weekly throughout 2012. so let's start today.

After 8yrs I'm finally off the pills. It's so convenient to pop one each morning to take the edge off the anxiety. I'd convinced myself that it was like adding 'Red X' to the petrol in my car; a little performance booster that did no harm and made the engine in my head run smoothly.

But surely if I'm to grow as a writer I need to feel more acutely. How can I truly observe and comment on the human condition if insulated from it? The pills had to go. Eight months of psychotherapy defragmented my thinking and took out all the damaged bits.

Next I discovered Moodscope. This brilliant (and currently free to use) web service asks me 20 pertinent questions each morning. The results translate into a graph. That graph plots my mood. It's academically robust and so credible. What is incredible though is the way it works. Or does for me anyway. The questions force me to think, albeit fleetingly about my well-being. My graph became more stable as my mood levelled out.

Next step, off the pills and in my case some quite interesting side effects. These have now passed so what I am feeling at the moment is what I really am - who I really am and more. It's quite exciting. It will give my writing in 2012 a human dimension that has thus far been suppressed. Watch this space!

The end of the line, or the light at the end of a tunnel?

2011-08-28T10:40:00.001+01:00

I'm very fond of my 87yr old uncle. We share a birthday and the prejudice and discrimination he has experienced in his life is one of the drivers of my own campaigning. He's gay, increasingly infirm but still up for a challenge.

Recently, he broke his hip and spent two weeks in hospital. Then, discharged before really ready he lasted a day at home before returning to the ward briefly, only to be discharged again. This time he was placed in an old folks home.

Dennis and I have often talked about old people's homes. His mother, my granny, died within days of being placed in one. It was not for her and so she opted out. I feared that history was about to be repeated. But, old folks homes have changed. What I found when I returned from holiday and visited Dennis surprised me.

He's in a new home operated by Runwood. I'd heard they were good and I now I know it. Spacious, modern, efficient and with really nice staff, the place was not quite as I'd imagined it. Yes there is the inevitable lounge with loud TV and a row of drooping, dribbling old ladies, but there's also a lot more.

I took in a portable TV and popped to Comet to get the digital box I needed. One of the care workers set it up for us, finding a SCART lead because I'd thought there was one in the box. They're going to spend time with him every day getting him confident on his feet and the plan is to have him home again within six weeks.

Like so many things, this was no where near as scary as I had imagined. Old folks homes don't have to be the end of the line. For some, they are the light at the end of a long dark tunnel!

Hello darkness my old friend

2011-07-19T08:56:00.003+01:00

I have been ‘out’ for years about the fact that I live with depression. In common with many professional creatives the enduring, varying tension between my perception and reality fuels my quest for answers. And increasingly, the work I do is all about finding the answers that have eluded other people. Folk in a fix are often too close to their personal and organisational challenges to see the wider context. I live in that wider context.

Depression however place demands upon those it inhabits. It’s vital to manage pace, space and focus on just one race. What do I mean?

Pace is everything because exhaustion brings on self doubt, followed by the damp dark foggy cloak that takes you out of circulation. Mood swing bring highs that make me feel invincible. They are always followed by a fall into darkness.

Space is equally important. I live in the countryside surrounded by fields. My home phone number is a closely guarded secret, known only to immediate family. I can shut the door on my work phone, close the garden gate and isolate myself from the world. This means I’m not always accessible; tough!

And sticking to one race is also essential. It’s so easy to get distracted and flounder as a multitude of equally regarded goals seem to wriggle from my grasp. Focus is difficult, but not to focus means to fail.

Right now, with professional help, I’m five weeks without an encounter with the ‘black dog’ of depression. It’s never far away I know, but if I throw it the odd negative thought or lingering self doubt it seems content to leave me alone.

It’s strange to say, but when under control, it’s fine occasionally to say hello to the darkness. It is after all my old friend!

Oh no, I'm getting old

2011-06-25T11:31:00.000+01:00

I flew to Glasgow on Thursday for a couple of meetings. One was with an innovative, enthusiastic and clearly very able social entrepreneur. He and I going to do some business together, as well as some campaigning which will be huge fun.

He sent me a text to say he'd be easy to spot as he was wearing a pink shirt. I still didn't spot him and had to ring him so that I could pick him out of the rather small crowd.

When we met I realised why I'd overlooked him in the airport arrivals hall. He's 25 and I was looking for someone twice that age! Over the next few hours I came to realise that youth was no barrier to this guy's considerable success. Over time however, I had clearly acquired a perception that to be successful you need to be middle aged. I'd assumed I was dealing with someone nearer my own age. Why did I feel that way? It rather pisses me off to find I have developed an ageist prejudice.

So, for the record - I now fully understand that you can be successful at any age. Mt next challenge is to appreciate that if people the same age as my kids can be very successful entrepreneurs, then clearly my kids are no longer kids but fully functioning adults. Yes, I knew this, but somehow . . . . . . . . well you know what I mean . . . doh!

Strut your stuff or peck someone's eyes out?

2011-06-18T07:52:00.002+01:00

I find 'society events' rather annoying. Most of the people are nice, the wine welcomed and the canapes fill a gap, but there's something superficial about all the air kisses and polite smalltalk that leaves me cold.

Last night, Belinda and I were at yet another of these evening receptions. To be fair I had some very useful business conversations and caught up with some people I like and respect, but the evening had its moments.

However had I not gone, I'd not have experienced one of the most outrageous examples of what I'll call lily pad hopping. One particular old frog, a well known local PR grabbed me for what I initially thought was going to be an interesting conversation about a stage performance we'd both recently seen in Cambridge.

However, mid conversation she spotted someone she considered more worthwhile approaching. She simply walked away leaving me in mid-sentence.Clearly she'd made a quick assessment and decided that the other people were far more useful to her. I detest the superficial way people like this treat others. By only talking to who you consider to be the most useful person within grasp at any one time, you prove to the world that you don't actually care about people - just what they can do for you.

Ironically and unbeknown to her, I spend a considerable amount each month with an excellent London PR agency. They take me seriously and deliver astounding results. They don't take me or anyone else for granted.

How can we expect our Big Society to help the vulnerable up the social ladder when there are people already on the ladder willing to put people down to further their own upward progress? Perhaps life at the bottom is better after all!

Would you accept cash in a car park from a Serbian car dealer?

2011-06-11T11:18:00.000+01:00

Well, I've just sold my 4x4 to a lady with a Serbian accent, who is buying it for a friend called Vlad. Deposit paid by credit card and the balance will be handed over in used tenners tomorrow.

My wife's response to the announcement that tomorrow we're driving two cars to a railway station to handover surprised me. 'It's probably drug money,' she said, 'or the proceeds from human trafficking.

My 'due dilligence' suggest otherwise. The buyer's Facebook profile shows a smiling middle aged lady holding a much loved dog. Surely a drug dealer would have a more sinister profile picture - perhaps something moody, with urban graffiti in the background and certainly dark glasses.

The deposit was paid via my website, which means I have the guys name, address, phone number and email address. Google reveals him to be a trustee of a Greek Orthodox religious charity so perhaps not a man likely to be shipping teenagers over the North Sea to satisfy the sexual desires of London's coke fuelled city traders.

Am I naive, or do dodgy people carefully craft respectable online personas to trick people like me? If we all thought that, then nobody would trust anyone. Surely the default for us all is to be honest, trustworthy and decent. Tell me I'm right - please!

An outbreak of third sector cannibalism

2011-05-30T09:01:00.001+01:00

I guess it had to happen. With funding cuts and the change in emphasis from 'gimme a grant' to 'how can I help you', cannibalism was perhaps to be expected. However rather than the nice friendly mergers I was expecting, folk are fighting dirty. It's a shame.

To avoid compromising what is actually quite a delicate situation, I'll not name names; however if you can guess who I'm talking about feel free to tweet - as we now know - even super-injunctions can't stop that!

So to the story. Imagine two young men, let's call them Less and Able. They've moved around the sector for years, working together at least twice. Able is very good at his job, gentle and passionate about making a difference. Less is not quite so bright and struggles to to settle down - deep down he means well, but somehow, never quite has the credibility of Able.

Like the similarly named Biblical brothers, tension grew and Less had an idea. He accused Able of using information gained at a previous employer in his current job. He did this by 'tipping off' the former employer with whom ironically both had worked and arguable Less had abused more!

Rather than tell Less to piss off, the former employer stormed into the new employers offices demanding retribution. Ironic again as the two organisations work closely together with the aggressor in this case being the one with the most to lose - the supplier.

Able is now under investigation and I suspect, looking for another job. Less is hoping he'll go so he can feel more secure.

The trouble is that when people and organisations fight each other everyone loses. Less will become far less popular once word gets out that he's tried to 'eat' Able. The two employers are in a no win argument from which nothing good can come. And this is the so called caring sector, there to help the weak and vulnerable in society get along. What would you do if you found yourself caught up in a situation like this?

Do you say it like it is or as people want to hear it?

2011-02-01T08:29:00.003Z

I was asked by a friend to provide a character reference this week. The guy has become tired of running his own business and decided to apply for a management job instead. The job is in a sector he has empathy with but as he told me; ' I’m not fooling myself into thinking I’m going to get it, or that I’m even qualified to do the job but it interests me and I thought I've got nothing to lose in giving it a bash.'

So was I right to refuse to provide a reference? It seemed to me that he was more interested in leaving where he was than in demonstrating, even to me, why he was the perfect man for the job he's after. Furthermore, knowing the person who is retiring and creating the vacancy, I just can't see my friend being happy moving into the empty seat. It involves too much bureaucracy!

Needless to say he's now quoting Mark Twain at me and accusing me of not being supportive in his time of need. My suggestion that he would do better to conquer his business challenges than run away and get a job touched a nerve. I'm probably now off his Christmas card list.

What he doesn't know is that over the past 21 years of self employment and running my own businesses, I too have had the urge to run away on perhaps three occasions. I too have filled in application forms for jobs, not because I want them, but because the pain of self employment, right then, was becoming too much. For me, filling in the form was usually enough; I threw them in the bin rather than post them and felt better for the flirtation with change.

I know many people who have fled from the pain of their current situation rather than face and conquer it. In every case, they have come to regret the move. Some have even turned the clock back and gone back, others could not and became stuck and very unhappy.

So, would you have lied and written a glowing reference or would you have refused, explained why and recognised the subsequent rejection as the price you have to pay for being honest?

A case of mistaken identity

2011-01-26T08:43:00.000Z

I went to an Awards event last night. It was organised by a professional institute and so most people were wearing grey. Most also had grey hair and many were far older than even I am.

I saw someone I thought I recognised. He was sitting on his own reading the Awards booklet. From the top of his head, he looked very like a guy I know called John. John is someone with whom I enjoy lively banter whenever we meet, usually at events like this one.

I kicked his foot by way of jovial introduction and said something like; 'hi, what brings you here.' The papers fell into his lap and the guy looked straight into my face. I then realised it was not John at all. I glanced down at his name badge. It said Brigadier; it said OBE and listed lots of other letters too. John on the other hand would only have letters after his name if he saved enough coupons from cereal packets.

'Hello, my name is Robert and I thought you were somebody else.' I said, slightly embarrassed. 'Oh that's OK he said, my name is Barry.' Unusually for me, I did not turn this serendipitous meeting into an opportunity. I must be losing my networking touch!

Bu why is it that the older people get, the more alike they look?

Could someone please introduce me to reality?

2011-01-20T10:06:00.000Z

Did you have a kaleidoscope as a child? You know, one of those tubes you peer into and twist to create startling, symmetrical patterns like the one here on your left.I did and spent hours looking through it, distorting things.

At times, life seems like that to me. In fact right now, two weeks into 2011 it feels very much that reality is being blurred into a series of confusing patterns. Is it the same for you too?

Perhaps I've had too many consecutive days of meeting bureaucrats, each recoiling from the dramatic change they face and have no influence over. Perhaps it's also because I've decided to stop working at the weekend and so am spending more time outside in my garden, on my tractor and generally connected with the natural cycle of seasons, climate and nature.

The landscape, bleak at this time of year, is bleak because it is this time of year. Leafless trees, sodden soil and frost browned grass. The other landscape is also very bleak right now. Job losses, budget cuts, tough decisions and inequalities - but are both equally real or is one an economic construct? Can we change the economy? We certainly can't change the climate - well not much.

and on a personal, micro-scale, just as one week 2011 seems filled with opportunity, so the next week it can look really gloomy? Now here I can make a difference . . . . . .so will focus there!

Back to the future

2010-12-05T11:07:00.001Z

The viral campaign on Facebook this weekend has been very, very successful. Although not started by the NSPCC it has their endorsement and is boosting public awareness of their cause.

People have been encouraged, by peer pressure, to change their Facebook profile picture to a cartoon character from their childhood. This wonderfully nostalgic exercise forces you to remember your own happy, innocent days when life was simple and for most people safe.

The campaign reminds those fortunate enough to have a happy childhood that for some kids, life is far from pleasant. By encouraging us all to reflect on our own early years, we are reminded of the importance of investing in an organisation that helps those for whom childhood memories will not be so happy.

I have a foot in both camps on this one. My very early years were happy I seem to remember, but as my childhood progressed things changed. Years of psychotherapy have helped me see that the deterioration of my father's mental health, together with my mother's inability to cope or courage to seek help, created the stultifying family environment from which I eventually emerged.

By coincidence, I saw the film 'Good Will Hunting' last night. It tells the story of a bright kid who chooses not to do well, to get even with his abusive foster parents long gone. Turning point in the film is the moment where his therapist keeps repeating the phrase; 'it's not your fault.' This repeated approbation does the trick and the film moves on to a happy ending.

Which brings me to Muffin the mule. My earliest TV memory, from those happy days of blissful innocence when life was easy and my story had only recently begun.

Never ask a man in a flat cap for a cappuccino

2010-11-28T14:25:00.000Z

I was taken out for lunch on Friday. The pub we went to was what some would call traditional and others would call retro. The place mats, paper napkins and lack of an open fire reminded me of the 'moderrnised' pubs I'd frequent 35 years ago.

Here you'd eat beef pie, treacle tart and drink beer, beer or perhaps just for a change, more beer. Soft drinks were for girls and coffee something you drank at home - and then only the instant variety.

The landlord wore a flat cap. Nothing wrong with that either I guess, perhaps he's sensitive about his baldness or simply making some kind of fashion statement. The food was hot and filling and a coffee seemed like a good idea. Asking for a cappuccino however prompted the kind of look you'd expect to get if you asked where the First Class compartment was on a Blackpool tram.

The man in a cap clearly knew what cappuccino was, but could not think why I'd be asking for it in his pub. We had 'nice' cups of filter coffee instead. He had a point I suppose and his pub was packed with people munching pies and enjoying jam rolypoly with custard.

Of course the problem is mine not his. I prefer not to be reminded of the 1970s and in particular the pubs I visited in that era. One thing is certain though; I'm going to avoid any place where the guy behind the bar is wearing a flat cap!

Be careful what you wish for

2010-11-16T08:04:00.000Z

I've always liked being busy, but right now opportunities seem to be leaping out at me from every corner. It's good to be recognised for the work I do. Better to be in demand by those willing to pay for what my expertise can deliver them. But being busy can have its down sides too. Not enough quality time for me, to re-charge, refresh and re-connect.

This week for example, my planned 'quiet day' with two meetings and time to enjoy the moment has been sacrificed to accept an invitation to a London event. No ordinary event, it's a Big Society workshop for senior civil servants and I'm told one or two Ministers of State. It's a unique opportunity to share my views with people able to shape policy and I hope, be swayed slightly in their thinking by the experiences I'll be sharing within them from my work at the 'Big Society' coalface. And yes, I'll learn from them too.

But the fact remains that my week now feels as if it's accelerating out of control. Much of this is of course perception and panic, whilst the reality means time to think and write on trains and for a couple of hours on Thursday morning in my favourite London hotel.

Being busy forces you to prioritise, to make time for the projects you're committed to completing. It also forces you to tread that fine line between saying yes to everything and sacrificing your sense of self and sanity, and being selective to protect what matters to the inner self.

It's a difficult path to tread and mot one foreseen when setting ambitious career goals.

Teddy Bear's Picnic

2010-10-11T06:51:00.000+01:00

I got talking with Jill last night at the Waffle House in Norwich. She's a fascinating old lady who has been a scientific researcher and College lecturer in her time. Now she's retired and gets involved in things - mental health is a shared interest.

Sunday evenings she usually visits the Waffle House, a long established and rather good place to prepare yourself for the week ahead. We too go there on Sunday's after a visit to the cinema.

Jill usually has a large teddy with her when she goes out for dinner. She lives alone and the teddy is her companion. Last night she was alone. It seems the owner of the place at suggested tactfully that she leave the teddy at home. 'It creates the wrong image' he'd gently told her. Reluctantly she'd complied and now eats alone.

It seems though that I'm the ninth customer to ask her where her teddy bear is. So that's one restaurant owner worrying that it's not giving the right impression and nine customers asking what's happened to the bear. I think they should invite her to bring her bear next time and give her a free meal as well. There's nothing wrong with eccentricity - it should be celebrated, not suppressed.

A happy coincidence - or was it?

2010-09-27T08:57:00.000+01:00

We visited HMV yesterday as we'd been given some vouchers and thought we'd check out the sale CDs and DVDs. I secretly hoped to find a copy of 'Of Time and the City', a wonderful film about Liverpool by Terence Davies. When we saw the film at the cinema, I was as moved as my wife was bored. It's really strange how films get to different people in different ways. My search for the DVD was therefore rather covert. I didn't want it discovered until we reached the till.

Alas, no DVD in HMV but guess what? It was broadcast on BBC4 last night and so I was able to record it. I'm not sure by what coincidence I thought about the film in HMV and decided to search for it. I did not then know it was being broadcast later the same day. Is it coincidence or premonition? Who knows . . .

Is this what reputation is all about?

2010-09-16T08:13:00.000+01:00

I met very modest but inspirational entrepreneur Paul Conrathe yesterday. He was one of the UK's leading lawyers representing children with special educational needs and then he opened a school. Now he has a very successful group of schools, one of which I visited as part of a current consultancy project.

When we met he told me how when he decided to open his first school, he bought a really good book. Six years later it's still on the shelf above his desk. He told me how nice it was to finally meet the author; yes that book was one I had written!

It is so easy to underestimate one's own reputation. Here for me then was a real illustration that for many people starting and growing successful enterprises, my books really do make a difference.I like hearing from people I have helped to succeed without even meeting them!

Find out more about Paul's work here.

Spending a penny and finding a conundrum

2010-08-29T14:55:00.000+01:00

You walk into the toilets in a posh restaurant and spot a coin on the floor, close to a toilet. Clearly it fell out of someone's trousers when they pulled them down (or up). The floor is dry and there's no one else around to see what you do.

You can choose to pocket the coin or leave it where it is. We all have our price and for me, faced with this conundrum last night thought long and hard before deciding what to do. In fact I decided that for me to pick up a coin in a toilet it had to be either a one or two pound coin. 50p or below and I'd leave it where it was.

It was a one pound coin and right now it is in my pocket.

What's your price? What's a coin got to be worth for you to pick it up and once in your pocket, what would you do with it?

The paradox of amibtion

2010-08-26T18:58:00.000+01:00

I was 55 at the weekend and inevitably spent time reflecting on my life thus far.

When I was 30 I'd been selling for five years and had already started to climb the career ladder. I thought I was invincible and for me success was easily measured by where my company Sierra sat in the range. At 33 I got a bright red two litre GLS - I'd reached the top of the company list and changed companies to get more.

The new firm indulged me with an identical GLS and a slightly higher salary. I thought I was worth more and lacked the wisdom to understand why the talent so obvious to me wasn't universally recognised by my bosses.

Now I'm 55, I have gained much of the wisdom I then lacked. I probably also have the commercial skills to command the high salary I then saw as my right. The trouble is, that I'm no longer ambitious in a material way. I'm more interested in the positive impact I can have than the money I can earn.

I suspect the world today remains full of young men with more ambition than ability. It's up to us who have long since grown up to help them reconcile what they can do with what that might give them. Then they might mature faster than we did and actually achieve more!

Past, present, future

2010-08-13T18:26:00.001+01:00

I visited the excellent Belsey Bridge Conference Centre today. Brilliant people, wonderful setting and facilities and prices that make it the perfect setting for the social enterprise residentials I'd like to run next year.

However I've always known the place by another name - All Hallows School. It's where my kid sister was sent by from the age of seven for reasons I'd rather not discuss. Actually Boarding School was good for her I think but it meant that she and I never really knew each other (I'm 9yrs older). Sadly we've not met or spoken for around 25yrs.

The school was very St Trinians in architecture and I'm sure in many other ways too. Last time I was there was in October 1980 when in a state of shock, I drove my distraught father there to break the news of our mother's sudden death. All that for me is now ancient history, but the conference centre, despite it's high tech gear, new decor and furniture is still essentially the school I last visited on that emotionally turbulent day.

The school library still contains old school books and one room had a display cabinet of old school trophies and cups. Both caused me to gulp, as did the whole visit. In fact I parked on the verge for ten minutes when the place came into view, to stop my heart racing before turning into the drive.

How amazing that after 30 years, a place can have such an effect on me. I now know I have to run a programme there if only to deal with the strong feelings visiting the place has evoked. I cannot wait 30yrs before I return . . no way

Big Society - Big Opportunity

2010-07-25T09:51:00.002+01:00

I've just written the text below for the organiser of an event I'm speaking at in September. He said it 'sounds fabulous' which set me thinking. There's so much bullsh*t and hot air being spouted about Big Society yet so few actually getting off their backsides to be amongst the first to rise to the challenge?
Am I unusual? Surely not:
The words
How to create your own reality behind the rhetoric
Robert Ashton believes that social enterprise is about attitude and action. He says you need attitude to make a difference in a financially sustainable
way. He also believes in action, describing Big Society as 'an open door through which the brave must step to create the world they want to see.'
Right now he's working with three communities seeking to do just that. A village seeking to regenerate their community, creating jobs and improving local services; a community determined to create a new community hospital that can never be taken away and a school not willing to sit back and accept hat the end of BSF means the end of their hopes for a new school in 2012
Robert is also an author, his 12th book, 'How to be a Social Entrepreneur' is published in October and can be pre-ordered at this event.

Why do we so readily miss the obvious?

2010-07-07T09:28:00.000+01:00

I ran a social enterprise 'netwalk' yesterday and made the mistake of leading the group last a village pub. Or at least I tried to lead the group past a pub. They unanimously decided it was time for a beer break and went in.

We asked the landlord what made his rural business successful? We were hoping for some useful tips we could take away and apply to our own businesses. He did not let us down. After much thought he smiled and said just one word: 'customers'.

He knew that pleasing customers was what made them keep coming back for more. Nothing complicated in that. Nothing challenging, just good old plain common sense.

Why then, do we worry about Business Link being disbanded. The answer perhaps is to stop complicating business and return to the basics. Satisfy your customers and you stay in business. Ignore them or fail to listen and adapt and no amount of clever consultancy will save you.

Fast or slow - which is best?

2010-06-24T08:16:00.000+01:00

Tomorrow is the copy deadline for my next book. I have 15,000 words left to write and am covering 3,000 words a day. I have a sneaky feeling that this pace delivers a better book than the Utopian 'chapter a week' rate we set out to do but never start soon enough.

I book written slowly, intertwined with everyday life and work is a book where you can't quite remember what was in Chapter 3 by the time to start writing Chapter 6. That can be very embarrassing as case studies you'd like to use and decide to use, are in your mind because you've used them already. Points get made twice and favourite phrases pop up with startling regularity.

Right now though, I'm doing it my preferred way. The book is my entire life, dominating every waking moment and every section builds on those it follows in a logical and structured way. I feel that only by achieving this level of intimacy and total focus as I write the book, can I even aspire to a close connection with my readers who will be buying the book in November.

All authors run over their deadline - maybe it's for a good reason. I'll argue that books are better for being written this way. Do you agree?

Village SOS - Save our Sanity

2010-05-15T09:36:00.001+01:00

Well, six months of hard work as village champion for West Norfolk village Hilgay did not result in a £400k grant for the village, a £30k fee for me and a 50min BBC One documentary for us all early next year.

It has however been a learning experience I'd not have missed for anything. To work with a great bunch of individuals from a small community, all determined to see things get better was been a humbling experience. It has also been incredibly frustrating. My June column in 'New Start' magazine will offer my top five tips for dealing with difficult people who simply cannot see that funders have their own agendas, rules and expectations. Self belief is not enough; you have to convince others.

Throughout the process I was in touch with several other village champions. It was clear all along that we were going to have to be different to stand out from a very well organised crowd. The strength of our project was its simplicity and scalability. It did not regrettably offer a nice building on which could be fixed a shiny Big Lottery plaque.

Setting aside me innate mercenary focus on income and a desire to appear on mainstream TV - the project is I think destined to be funded in other ways. From the village's point of view, this means regeneration at a more realistic pace. For me, it means less income but actually a more scalable, achievable process I might help other communities through. Not everyone can attract big funding from the Big Lottery. For most I suspect a more modest gradual series of changes are going to be better suited.

As ever I am looking for the opportunity. Now the Lottery hopes have vanished, the real opportunity is actually becoming clearer.

would you pay to hear it like it really is?

2010-04-02T18:15:00.000+01:00

A month without a blog. Has anyone missed me? Perhaps not, but should I take the risk of silence? It's good to talk and speak your mind, even if in my case my mind sees the world differently to others.

I'm told I'm outspoken yet whenever I speak to a group or write an article or book, I carefully self censor. Why, well I have to consider that the more prudish people sometimes have big budgets to spend and will read my public utterances by way of research.

So I have an idea. Why not create a subscription only me, acessible only by those who have signed a disclaimer and paid a modest annual fee. Then I can be myself - critical, brutal and at times rather rude. Not you understand rude in a Les Dawson kind of way - more in the way your best friend describe the best way to escape from your burning house. Thats no nonsense, no euphamisms and no pussy footing around the truth.

I want to out the awful and suggest alternatives that work. I want to tell people committed to real, sustainable enterprise how I see the world of business support, business growth and business survival.

Would you pay to be kept informed, probably entertained and at times maybe even shocked? What's it worth? Tell me and then watch this space - or rather a space not far away. Something's brewing and it's going to be good.

Cheque out

2010-02-20T07:42:00.000Z

I'm a Trustee of Norfolk Community Foundation and so often meet people who give money to charity. Indeed the Foundation's role is to make it easy for people to become donors, by providing a very personal, professional and focused service. Their money is well invested to create an endowment fund from which the income will be distributed as grants for ever.

However I'm rarely there when the cheque is passed across; the very moment of commitment. The other day I witnessed a donor signing and passing over a cheque for £100,000. It's massively more than I give each year and indeed, more than I usually earn in a year. Yet to this donor, it was simply part of his programme of investing in Norfolk; the place where he was born, lives and has always called home.

I had that sudden thought that by comparison, my contributions were insignificant. The reality is though, that as Tesco are alwasy quick to tell us; 'every little helps.' The success of any endowment building charity relies as much on the many who give a little as thew few fortunate enough to be able to give a lot.

Tories will bang Business Link on the head

2010-02-14T14:17:00.000Z

Today's Sunday Times carries a story by Rachel Bridge that explains how an incoming Conservative government plan to zap Business Link. Instead they plan to increase funding to Enterprise Agencies and let them get on with the job. The problem with Business Link says Mark Prisk, the most likely contender for the role of Small Business minister, is that Business Link spend £190m pa pointing people towards sources of help, rather than helping people solve their problems themselves.

It's good news for the Enterprise Agency movement, who in my experience are far more passionate about enterprise than Business Link. But are Business Link really so bad they need to disappear? I think not. Instead of getting rid of the good ones as well as the bad, why not give them three years to become self funding. Give them the freedom to follow their market and the flexibility to build local partnerships that make sense.

There's nothing with the people who work for Business Link - what's wrong is the top down, one size suits all regime they have to work under.

The next BIG idea

2010-02-12T09:16:00.000Z

Great to see that the Big Lottery are to put a greater focus on their 'Reaching Communities' initiative. Especially welcome is the simplified 'Light' version that makes application less daunting for people looking for up to £40k pa for up to five years to get their project off the ground.

It's good to see a big funder making things easier. Perhaps others will now follow their example!

There's something strange about a man who buys a villa on Lanzarote

2010-02-06T18:23:00.001Z

Today's local daily paper carries a story about the company that made me redundant in 1990. I came to be hugely grateful to their MD who gave me the push because without that nudge, I'd probably still be working for someone else.

Alas his company went bust last year, no small feat when the firm's been around 40 years and has had plenty of time to stash away plenty of rainy day money. I guess there's a moral there somewhere, but that's not the point I want to make. The news story was about two of the assets of the firm yet to be bought from the receiver.

The assets were an interesting combination. A development of park homes in mid Norfolk and a villa on Lanzarote. One was an investment closely linked to the company's core business. The other perhaps less so.

The story got me thinking. I've been to Lanzarote to speak at a conference. It's a volcanic island with nothing to do or see; people go there to lay in the sun, eat drink and party. Why would a real entrepreneur buy a villa there? Aren't entrepreneurs more likely to invest in places where there's lots going on?

How will you celebrate New Year's Eve in 2099?

2010-02-06T18:12:00.000Z

Alas I'm not expecting to stay alive long enough for that one, but Frank here stands a very good chance of doing just that. Frank and his dad Rob were with me on Thursday evening when I spoke to an audience of social entrepreneurs in Leeds for Business Link Yorks and Humber. Rob and I have known each other a while, both being passionate and vocal about social enterprise. We met up at Voice 10 and he let slip that he'd be bringing Frank along to meet me in Leeds later in the week. I think that mum was out as well that evening so Rob was babysitting.

I used this picture of Frank in my presentation to make the point that just because we would not be around in 2100, here's a guy who would. It's the way we behave now, in terms of enterprise and environment that will shape Frank's future.

Furthermore he's growing up in a very different age to the one I was raised in. The 50 years that have passed since I was Frank's age have seen huge change; colossal growth in consumerism being just one of them. It strikes me that things I'd experienced at his age, central heating, a family car and 24/7 entertainment on demand are the very things hid generation might choose to do without. I'd never had them and he'll probably decide to get by without. Together, he and I bracket the consumerist age.

You can see what Rob Greenland, Frank's dad thought of all this by visiting his blog. It's well worth subscribing to.

Let's all be stick in the muds

2010-02-04T07:37:00.000Z

Yesterday I attended a brilliant meeting in West Norfolk. It was all about opportunities to diversify, develop and generally improve the success of the local economy.

The notion of a water taxi captured the imagination of a quite a few people. Until that is a local farmer pointed out that on a tidal river, you'd only be able to make one trip each way per day.

Voice 10 - well worth listening to

2010-02-04T07:31:00.000Z

There are two advantages to being the last person to blog about Voice 10, the Social Enterprise Coalition's annual conference. One is that you've had time to reflect on what was said and the other, is that you are spared the hassle of keying in all the best bits.

The best speaker by a mile was Phillip Blond. He's the first person I've heard publicly say what I've long thought: that tomorrow, every enterprise will be a social enterprise. Quite rightly in my view, he says that community ownership will become universal, albeit in differing forms. It's what real democracy is about! I was not surprised to spot that he's left handed.

Social Enterprise magazine have kindly captured the best quotes of the conference and placed them here. They're well worth reading!

The Right to Try

2010-01-29T07:33:00.000Z

The Plunkett Foundation staged a brilliant conference earlier this week. The 'Right to Try' focused hard on the inevitable need to communities to take the initiative and improve themselves, rather than wait for our cash strapped Government to do it for them.

Particularly interesting was the way the incoming Conservative Government plan to give communities the 'right to buy' redundant community buildings. This will go a long way towards keeping and building community space. (You can't be an active community if everyone stays at home!)

The conference also explored one of the most challenging community conundrums. How is it, that when good stuff happens in one place, others don't follow and do the same. Instead we constantly see missed opportunities and struggling pioneers, reinventing wheels which, are already spinning perfectly a few miles down the road.

I have an idea brewing here, that would highlight opportunities in a dynamic and alluring way. More on this later.

Sunny delight

2010-01-23T14:57:00.000Z

The Times recently reported an alarming rise in the incidence of rickets amongst British children. The condition is the result of vitamin D deficiency and is caused by staying out of the sun and not eating a balanced diet.

It seems strange that after more than 100 years of medical research and social reform people should now opt out of good health. In the Victorian slums bow legged children, deformed by rickets were all too common. Parents were poor, housing was poor and good food hard to find and harder to pay for. Now rickets is back by choice.

It's no longer considered safe to let children play outside; the fear of skin cancer, paedophiles and traffic is too great. Equally, fast food is so much faster and tastier than anything involving vegetables.

We seem to have reached the point where a happy healthy life is deemed too risky for young people. Deformity, obesity and social isolation is considered a far less risky option. Now it's only mad dogs that go out in the midday sun

Retail is detail

2010-01-19T08:50:00.001Z

I wonder what it costs to convert a city centre pub into a pizza/pasta restaurant? Certainly a lot more than it costs to clean a few windows. So why invest in one and not the other?

We almost went to a new Norwich pizza restaurant last night. It's been reviewed in the local paper and is not part of a chain, so worth supporting.

The menu outside seemed OK but the view of the restaurant was not. The glass in the door had been half heartedly cleaned and was all smeary. So was the mirror on the wall just inside. It makes you wonder if the glasses and plates get the same treatment? We turned round and went to Pizza Express - the 'devil we know' instead.

Dirty windows suggests a lack of attention to detail. Windows are detail you can see. In a restaurant, there are plenty of places where you can't see people taking short cuts.

As with anything new, people will only try it if it's clearly as good as what they're used to. The restaurateur saved five minutes - but it cost him a customer.

Mean and green!

2010-01-16T10:03:00.000Z

We recently had a comprehensive energy use survey of our business premises here. Carried out by Brian Holder from University College Suffolk the work was funded with an EEDA grant.

The results were interesting and we're already saving money. Later this year we'll be applying for planning consent for a wind turbine and we've been exploring solar hot water heating.

But insulation was the area I found most startling. I specialist contractor took a look and suggested cavity wall insulation between the Edwardian brick skin and 17th century inner structure of our farmhouse. I'd forgotten we have a cavity to fill, That work will be done later this month.

A large sold brick wall separates our living space (a barn) and a former grain store. Here they suggested an external insulation material that costs an eye watering £4,300. I'm going to go for a greener and meaner alternative. A wall of wheat straw bales that we'll buy off the field at harvest and bring the bales home with my tractor and trailer. Estimated saving £4,000. Cool eh!

CICs to become a better investment proposition

2010-01-14T08:16:00.000Z

It's great to read today that as a result of the recent review of the CIC structure, the rules are to be changed. I'm always thought that CIC limited by share offers the greatest potential. It allows for genuine, meaningful community involvement (through share holding) and means you can attract external investors too.

From 6 April a CIC will be able to give investors up to 20% return. This is a very, very positive move. I only hope it encourages more people to see and value the merits of the CIC limited by share option. At last social enterprises can attract investment in a way that rewards the investor. We all want to do good; now we can invest in social enterprises without losing out.

Dying to meet you

2010-01-12T08:10:00.000Z

We're contract publishing a magazine read by retired people and offered a couple of worthwhile charities a special ad rate as we had two pages to fill at deadline. Both chose to run legacy ads which got me thinking

Both have professional marketing teams and both clearly know their marketplace, but why seek to start your donor relationship by promoting legacies? Would they not have done better to find ways to get to know our readers and make them feel valued, before asking the legacy question?

I'm the lead Trustee on marketing with Norfolk Community Foundation. Here our policy is to introduce donors to the organisation and the work that it does long before they consider their own death. I'm pretty sure that when the Foundation gets legacies, they will be from people who have become familiar with our work and comfortable with our ways.

I'd say that the more personal the product you're selling, the more important it is to really get close to your prospect before popping the question. Dead simple really . . . . .

2010's going to be a bouncy year

2010-01-09T09:35:00.002Z

One of my current projects is to explore the opportunity for a GP Practice to set up a nursing home. The vision is for the nursing home to be community owned. By this I don't mean in a token sense, with regular open days and consultation. I mean set up as a community interest company with local people able to become shareholders.

This set me looking into how care homes are managed and that led me to Eden Alternative. As much a philosophy as anything else, the Eden Alternative is a fresh and exciting way to care for the old and vulnerable. People are encouraged to stay active, involved and to care for others. It's simple yet clearly highly effective.

I'll be using this image in my presentation to the doctors next week. We only get new things if we challenge our perceptions and recognise that things don't always have to stay the same.

The penny has dropped

2009-12-20T09:14:00.003Z

As the working year closes and my thoughts turn to 2010 the penny has finally dropped. I've worried for too long about what others might think or expect. I've wondered how to separate what others might consider 'work blogs' from 'personal blogs' and have realised that what I'm looking for doesn't exist.

In tomorrow's world there will be no distinction between work and life so why try to create one here? As we move from materialism to a new order of things, people and shared experiences will be what we seek and value. No longer will we work hard to buy things to 'enjoy' on our own. We will rediscover a simpler life and learn to be ourselves.

A while ago I blogged about a local bureaucrat who sat through a meeting disagreeing with everything, only to say as he left that personally he was in favour. In other words he had chosen to ignore his own instinct and judgement to toe the party line - or what he saw as the party line. These attitudes can start wars!

So - from here on in I am going to be a wysisyg man. No separation between what I feel and what I do. No compromising of my values to suck up to my clients. I'm simply going to be me and stick to what I feel is right. That said, I'm going to invite challenge and debate as views and standpoints need to be challenged.

So -more blogs in 2010 and more reaching out for feedback.

Nice bogs, shame about the frontage

2009-12-08T19:05:00.004Z

I had lunch at a really nice seaside hotel today. Good food, attentive staff, tasteful decor and really posh toilets. The problem was the first impression you gain as you walk across the car park.

The front windows were rotting with leads poked through for the sparkly Christmas trees in the car park. There were rusty grab handles for older customers to haul themselves up the steps, weeds, fag-ends and a generally neglected feel to the front of the building. Only when you walk inside do you see where the owners have invested their money.

Of course I'd far prefer to have a crap frontage and nice hotel than a crap hotel that looks good from outside. The trouble is though, that had I not been meeting someone there, I'd not have ventured through the front door. It really looked grim from outside!

You're never over the hill

2009-12-07T15:23:00.003Z

Did you see the repeat of Thora Hird's performance in Bennett's 'Talking Heads' on BBC TV at the weekend?

It was am amazing performance that touches you today just as it did when first broadcast a decade ago. Dame Thora Hird was 87 when she made the film and many would say it was her finest performance - in fact it won her a second BAFTA.

In a world where most would have chosen to use a younger actress to play and old lady, using make up to add the years, Bennett chose to use an old lady with talent and a proven track record. He was clearly right.

Are you ageist? Even unwittingly? Think about it - some of those too often overlooked and ignored have lots more to offer.

Why are all expected to behave like babies?

2009-10-17T12:00:00.003+01:00

I've long wondered why grown-ups (Chavs in particular) like to walk around in romper suits and drink from bottles with a pull up teat cap. These bottle caps encourage you to suck at your drink like an eager baby. Maybe the marketers think that we all yearn to return to the breast and so provide fizzy drinks you can suck through a plastic nipple.

I drink a lot of water and so far, Sainsbury's water bottles have had proper caps. The kind you unscrew before drinking from the open bottle. I always have one in the car. Sure there's a risk of spillage which, if you're driving can create a suspicious wet patch on your trousers - but that's an acceptable risk.

Now Sainsbury's have decided to put teat-caps on the top of their water bottles. Do they expect me to suck my water like a baby? (Perhaps they can also provide someone to wind me after my drink - in case I get tummy ache!)

I refuse to drink like a baby so will start saving proper caps to re-use. In fact I might as well re-fill my old bottles with tap water. Sod Sainsbury's!

The power of post script

2009-10-03T09:04:00.003+01:00

I've not felt moved to blog of late, too busy I guess. However a recent chance meeting with Steve Short, magician and all round nice guy got me thinking.

I first met Steve when he was a children's magician in Norfolk 20yrs ago. This week we both found ourself presenting at a Leicester Business Event. I was determined to hear his presentation and was surprised by how well he used magic to make sound business points.

However the thing he said that struck a chord with me was this: after the headline and the sign off, the next thing people look at on a letter or email is the PS. I was once a big fan of the PS and used it to good effect all the time. Of late I've stopped . . . . but don't know why. So now, I'm going to make October a post script month.

PS See if you can catch me out - let me know if I contact you and there's no PS!

Are you haunted too?

2009-08-23T11:26:00.005+01:00

Yesterday I spent a very pleasant afternoon with my ancient uncle, pruning trees and cutting grass. He has lived in his bungalow since he had it build 49 years ago. I've been visiting since then so the place is important to me too.

As he's aged (he's now 85) the large garden has gradually taken over, hence my frenzied strimming and sawing. Over the years, a housing estate has been built around him and what was a quiet unmade lane is now a well lit thoroughfare. His bungalow rather stands out, an oasis of history amongst a modern urban sprawl.

The problem started when the paper boy refused to deliver. 'It's too scary,' he said. Then maurauding youngsters started throwing pebbles at his windows after dark. He won't admit it, but he's become rather worried by all this, keeps his door securely bolted and spends little time in his front garden.

To his neighbours, I suspect he's viewed as an oddity. A tall, gaunt old man who likes to wear short shorts with long green socks - a style he developed in India during WW2. He lives alone, which in these 'stranger danger days' means he's also treated with some suspicion.

What gets me, is that here's a man who who prefers his own company to that of others, who now through no fault of his own is feeling increasingly a prisoner in his own home.

Wouldn't it be nice if his neighbours, talked to their kids, explained that getting old happens to us all, and now and then, offered to help him keep his roadside verge as neatly trimmed as their's.

To blog or not to blog . . that is the question

2009-08-12T18:53:00.003+01:00

Blogging is unlike almost anything else in life. It's something once started you feel almost honour bound to continue, even if you're getting no feedback from your readers.

I'm lucky in that I get lots of feedback, on and off line, but for some it must be a real challenge. Of late, I've simply not had time to post anything, despite having lots to say. I try to take it easy in the summer, less work, less noise and more time with family.

Does blogging do it for you? Are you busy because of your blogs or because you're busy blogging. Is it the next big business thing, or simply much ado about nothing?

Costa fortune!

2009-06-13T10:24:00.003+01:00

Had my pocket picked and my wallet emptied in Costa Coffee's New Row cafe nr Covent Garden yesterday. To be fair, they had got a sign saying 'pickpockets operate here' but could they do more to prevent their customers getting robbed?

CCTV would help, as would approaching people who come in and sit down without buying a drink. After all, if you need to steal the money for your cappuccino then why are you there?

The staff reaction to my sudden poverty was rather worrying. It's clearly something that happens there every day. I began to wonder if they greet the regular pickpockets with a cheery wave; simply another London worker going about his daily routine.

I wonder if they'd show more interest if I'd been assaulted or mugged instead?I got the feeling that if I'd been stabbed, the staff would just drag me outside so I didn't make a mess on their floor.

Means tested consultancy quotes

2009-06-08T07:31:00.004+01:00

I saw a brilliant example of consultant greed the other day. It was a piece of PR work for a charity. The organisation's Chairman, a wealthy entrepreneur had agreed to foot the bill.

The proposal outlined a fairly unimaginative list of tasks, including copying names of accountants out from the Yellow Pages. (Something most of us gave up doing ten years ago!)

The consultant, who shall remain nameless, priced this project at more than £20,000. I'd say it was worth £3,000 and only then if I didn't know that there was no point in chasing editors of weekly papers when all get their news feeds from their group HQ.

There's nothing wrong with discounting your day rate for a voluntary organisation. I do it on my website where I publish my day rates for all to see. But to inflate your day rate because the guy paying is wealthy? That's robbery!

Get bolder as you get older!

2009-05-17T09:03:00.002+01:00

Prof Heinz Wolff is quoted in The Times recently as saying that: 'Timidity is very ageing. Fight it to stay younger. After all, with each year that passes you have less to lose.'

These wise words have really got me thinking. Am I getting more timid as I age? I like to think I'm getting bolder, but sometimes I do wonder. I certainly worry far less about what others will think and more than ever before, do as I please for most of the time.

But what about risk? When did I last really push myself far beyond what is comfortable? Of course I push myself to the limit in the gym, dizziness, nausea and floods of sweat are vital in my view if you're to keep your body young. But what about risking reputation, money, personal safety, sanity even? Hmmmmmmm let me think . . . . . . what shall I do first?

Me do multi-level marketing? Never!

2009-05-09T09:22:00.002+01:00

You know how it goes. Someone you know and respect calls you to arrange a conversation with a third party. In this case, via conference call. You hear the personal story - I had it, lost it and found it again thanks to xyz.

You're shown company xyz and then, surprise surprise, told how you can profit from helping those you know to benefit from what xyz does. Then comes the soft close - I'm committed and will help you if you decide to come on board.

I have to admit that this one does have a good range of products and will I think take the world by storm. But then so does a flu epidemic; the challenge is to leave people feeling better than you found them.

The clincher for me was the company vision of making one million people millionaires. At whose expense I asked myself?

I'll help anyone with a good idea spread the word. I'll recommend any product or service that impresses me. But I draw the line at trading my independence to join any organisation - however appealing the offer.

Time to grow home

2009-04-26T08:28:00.003+01:00

It might seem strange, but to me, the best time to start a business in in the depths of recession. You create an enterprise that is lean, fit, hungry and responsive to market demand. Then, when the economy brightens up, you're in the right place at a very good time.

Of course I already have a business although in reality it's very modest in size. But that's about to change. As my reputation as a writer and speaker grows, more people are asking me to help them give their organisation a boost. Time is my only limiting factor and so the answer is of course to build a team and give them the methodology, skills and support to deliver what people are demanding.

To create some space between me and the business, it has a new website www.turnpikefarm.co.uk
which goes live in a day or two. Turnpike Farm is the place I live and work. It's also the place where we cultivate success and grow enterprises. It should be fun!

I love buses but I don't have all day . . .

2009-03-28T12:15:00.004Z

I'm attending a meeting in Swaffham later this week. It's a Mental Health Trust Governors' gathering, with people coming from all over Norfolk and North Suffolk.

With the papers for the session were travel details for those wishing (or having) to use public transport. The furthest away you could be from Swaffham is Lowestoft - a journey of 57 miles. By car, it's about 75 minutes. By bus it's 3hrs 24minutes. You catch a bus in Lowestoft at 10am, change at Yarmouth and again at Norwich. That's an average speed of just over 16 miles an hour. It'd be faster to come on your bike!

How can people be expected to leave their cars at home and take the bus when it takes so bloody long to get anywhere?

Let's all glow in the dark

2009-03-15T09:01:00.005Z

Two seemingly contradictory press articles this week paint a bleak picture for the future of our urban landscape.

One suggests that because the Courts are likely to consider injured cyclists in-part culpable if they don't wear a helmet. The commentator asks if the next step is for pedestrians to also be required to wear helmets or be considered contributors to their own fate when mown down by passing traffic. We already see more and more people wearing hi-vis jackets when out walking - helmets are the next logical step in the footpath to political correct behaviour for us all.

The second article described how Boris wants to strip some London streets of signs, white lines and speed bumps - seamlessly blending foot with wheeled traffic, so that people have to think. This is already established practice in parts of the Netherlands, where removing street signs and other clutter encourages drivers and pedestrians to seek eye contact - thus collaborating to create a safe environment.

Put the two together and you can quickly see a situation where the roads are free of confusing signs, but filled with people walking in hard hats and hi-vis waistcoats.

Now that's really confusing!

How strongly do you support your organisation's cause?

2009-03-05T08:36:00.005Z

My friend Hanne Stinson, CEO of the British Humanist Association has literally nailed her colours to the charity's mast. She promised her membership that if they raised £20,000 she'd have the humanist logo tattooed on her arm. They did it and so did she!

Hanne is very much a 21st century activist. Her organisation doesn't march, wave banners or pelt people with eggs. Instead it encourages people to consider the notion that life is about people, not about preparing for some vaguely promised post-mortem utopia. It's how you live your life that matters - there is nothing else. You've probably seen or read about their very successful bus advertising campaign.

You might not agree with the humanist philosophy but you have to agree that if more business leaders were as committed to their cause as Hanne is to hers, our economy would be in better shape. We all have to champion what we believe is right - sitting on the fence, or even the sofa, is not an option in today's world.

Why do factories exist?

2009-02-24T09:06:00.004Z

The recent reports claiming that the Astra factory at Ellesmere Port is on the brink of closure raises a large and worrying question. The unions are saying that without Government funding, the plant will close, putting thousands of workers out of work. They cite this as good enough reason to put money in.

Yet surely, a car plant exists to make cars in response to market demand. If there's no demand, why continue?

Or perhaps it is right to create jobs. Unemployment is not pleasant and once you add the cost of benefits and re-trainnig, perhaps keeping the plant open actually represents value for money. If that was the case, all public sector organisations could be ordered by buy the cars. But what would the impact of that be on other manufacturers?

To me, the world needs to make a very simple decision. Nationalise everything and forget about market demand or individual choice. In fact we could also have national pay scales that dictate what everybodfy earns. OR stop interfering and let supply and demand balance themselves naturally. A little or each simply won't work . . .

I never thought I'd find myself quoting Jimmy Osmond

2009-01-28T17:16:00.003Z

Talented though I'm sure he is, this guy's music has never done anything for me at all. His most famous song, was one I remember had lots of 'turn that thing off' appeal when I was young and he was even younger.

However, today I went to the gym determined to spent 45 mins sweating steadily on the exercise bike. A few feet in front of me was a TV screen and on it, Alan Titchmarsh, former gardener now daytime TV chat show host.

He interviewed Osmond who is currently appearing in the West End in 'Grease' and it was towards the end of the interview that the pearl of wisdom emerged. In fact it was rather a powerful moment, perhaps because I was close to fainting with the exertion on the bike.

Osmond said that one of the best things he learned from his family was how to adapt to life after the spotlight of fame has moved off you and onto someone else. How many people can you think of who deprived of their accustomed status by retirement, redundancy or changing fashion struggle to re-invent themselves?

So, Osmond might not be someone I'd rush out to listen to on stage, but when talking about life, the guy talks real sense. There - I'm converted!

Do cyclists shout at you to help them pedal faster?

2009-01-24T12:08:00.003Z

Cooling down after a nice run I was walking back along the road near my home when a passing cyclist shouted, 'get out of the road'. He had all the gear on, including one of those rather silly streamlined helmets.

Alas he didn't stop to offer more specific advice about where he felt I should be walking. My choice was simple. An overgrown verge, complete with dangling brambles, long grass and hidden holes, or the road. I chose the road. There's no footpath.

So whose road is it I wonder? He cycles on it, I run on it and I suspect we both drive on it too. Next time I seee him I'll shout back and run after him. Then we'll see!

Do people try to tell you what to do? Do you listen to them or ignore their advice?

Need a helping hand?

2009-01-21T08:12:00.003Z

I met a really interesting guy the other day. He had quite literally paid an arm and a leg to be where he is today. He's a double amputee.

However, far from being a 'professional victim', he's positive and eager to make a difference in the world. He has started his own business and sees no barriers, just opportunities.

He described how he once wrote to disability champion Simon Weston and Simon picked up the phone and called for a chat. 99% of people would not have written the letter, but this guy just does it.

It really puts your own problems and anxieties in perspective when you meet someone who makes light of what in reality must be a horrific thing to live with. In his situation, I'd make a list of all the things I could not do and get depressed. He wrote a list of what was still possible and got on with life.

I learned a lot from meeting him. What do you think he could teach you?

I was good at the dentist today

2009-01-09T12:55:00.003Z

I'm not sure why, but everyone at my office was surprised when I came back from the dentist wearing this sticker. I had been good so I reckon I deserved it!

Bella kindly explained that normally only children get stickers, but why I wonder? I'd spent a record 46 minutes having a tooth ground down to have a crown fitted. That's three quarters of an hour with a mouth full of latex fingers, sucking pipes and not forgetting that whining drill.

Actually Christine my dentist is very good and her assistant Stacey kept me amused by pulling faces all the way through the procedure. In fact, Stacey deserves a sticker as well.

My point though is this: why do we assume that only young people like to be told they've been good? Perhaps in these troubled times more people should take the trouble to thank their customers and reward their commitment to seeing through what might be every bit as scary as a trip to the dentist. Do you agree?

Gym'll fix it!

2009-01-03T09:19:00.003Z

Every newspaper I read has its own recession busting, money saving tips. Without exception, they all suggest that dumping the gym membership is a good way to save a few pounds a week.

Wrong! Without the encouragement and equipment of a good gym, most people let their fitness regime slip. Being unfit makes you feel lethargic, sees your belly creep over your belt and make even carrying the shopping home a physical trial.

How much better to feel good, have a body you can be proud of and enjoy that rush of endorphins you can only achieve with a good workout. Furthermore the complete break from work or home pressures that an hour in the gym provides is a good way to reflect on your day and put things in perspective in your mind.

Of course press ups in the kitchen and star jumps in the hall, followed by a brisk jog around the park and some sit ups at the bus stop can get you just as fit. But will you really keep that up?

At the gym you can also find people to urge you along, spar with you, congratulate you when you reach a milestone and even compete with you.

There's no doubt in my mind that given the chance, however bleak things look, gym'll fix it!

'Emotional hurt is the price a person has to pay to be independent'

2008-12-27T09:36:00.006Z

'So the fact that I'm me and no one else is one of my greatest assets. Emotional hurt is the price a person has to pay to be independent' wrote Haruki Murakami in 'What I talk about when I talk about running'.

Murakami is one of my favourite contemporary novelists - he is a great story teller, but in this book, he's talking about himself and two of his great passions, running and writing. They're two of my greatest passions too.

But his comments about the emotional cost of being independent rather than simply following the herd, read on 24th December, really captured for me the immense discomfort I always feel when under huge pressure to conform and celebrate Christmas. I am not a Christian and I do not like following the herd. I would prefer to celebrate personal achievements and events that indulge in the frenzied, mass hysteria that is Christmas today.

Our daughter, working in Ethiopia spent Christmas day at work. On their calendar, the big day happens in two weeks time . . . . which illustrates if nothing else the innacuracy of the day anyway.

This is not a rant about Christmas, more an expression of concern for the expectations it places upon people to conform. Surely in today's politically correct, inclusive, gender neutral society, expecting people to pass on individuality to conform to the collective christmas ideal is wrong.

Or am I just being silly?

Word's getting out . .

2008-12-19T14:01:00.007Z

I really was a little cynical when The Business Channel on Sky told me that my TV series would attract a million viewers. Today I finally had proof that I'm reaching living rooms I never expected to reach.

Today a Christmas card arrived from my wife's now retired ex boss, he was a head teacher. Now a retired headteacher is not someone I'd expect to have seen me on TV, but from the nice comment in the card, he clearly has!

And yesterday, at a lively 4Networking meeting in Solihull, there where several who'd come along because they'd seen me on the telly. (View a clip here)

I'm now clearing my cupboard of skeletons, ready for the day the tabloids get me in their sights!!!!!!

I wannabe me

2008-12-13T10:46:00.004Z

Ever since hiring Bella as my new Business Manager I've been challenging myself to BE the person I want to be. This might sound daft, but too many folk distort themselves into what they think those that hire them are expecting.

A recent incident highlighted to me that it really is time to take my own advice and plough my own furrow across the currently frozen business landscape. I always tell people that if the customer's asking you to do things you really don't find comfortable, then it's time to change the street corner you loiter on seeking custom.

I'm planning to say no to anyone who won't buy my alternative style of business advice. I'm going to be me - There, ny first NY resolution!

BT are back in my good books

2008-12-01T10:30:00.002Z

I forwarded an email from the editor of a newspaper eager to publish details of my battle with the BT call centre, to the BT Press Office with amazing results. All I said as that in the interests of fairness, I wanted them to have the opportunity to comment on the 'soon to be published' story.

Within hours soneone rang me up, sorted out the problem, had my phone reconnected and sent me a little something by way of compensation.

Of course 99.9% of problems encountered by BT customers can be quickly sorted out by their call centre staff. If however your problem falls into the 0.1% that are hard to resolve, there needs to be a system that screens them out and points them towards a 'special problems team' with greater access to the 'system' and greater freedom to get things done.

For anyone with a complex business, millions of customers and a need to control costs I'd recommend setting up a 'special problems' team - it would relly improve public opinion!

Finger licking bad

2008-11-25T19:11:00.004Z

When did that disgusting habit of licking your finger before turning a page go out of fashion?

I sat on the train this morning (in First Class) and watched a 60+ year old city type reviewing documents from his briefcase. Before turning the page he popped his finger in his mouth. I can remember my father doing this and have an 84yr old uncle who does it too. I can remember the practice being ‘normal’ but today it really does seem unhygienic.

What’s changed? Are pages now less prone to stick together? Or have we simply realised that passing round paperwork drizzled with spit is not very nice?

Beware - cardboard boxes are potential death traps

2008-11-16T16:20:00.003Z

Wanting to post some stuff to our daughter in Ethiopia, we popped into Sainsburys and as we paid for our stuff, asked if we could please have a strong cardboard box.

The answer was that 'for health & safety' reasons, boxes can no longer be given to customers. Perhaps we're only weeks away from plastic bags also being considered too dangerous and then there're those trollies - all those hard corners etc.

In 2009 I expect all supermarkets to ban customers from doing anything more risky than walking round the aisles preparing a list of shopping that will then be delivered to your home later in the day. How did we used to manage in the dark old days of the 20th century?

BT - one week on - still no phone

2008-11-16T16:14:00.004Z

I'm getting really good at surfing the BT phone system. Over the past week a number of dedicated BT employees have tried to help me get my home phone reconnected. All have failed. Today's top tip was to cancel my direct debit and then ring tomorrow to pay the outstanding (but not due for payment yet) £8.21 by debit card. Then I'm told I can have a phone again.

Others have said I'll need to pay a reconnection charge, one said there was no line to my home so a survey was needed by an engineer to see if connection was possible and a third simply hung up.

Even the online complaints department took three days to politely suggest I simply needed to place an order for a phone line. The thing is, until last Saturday I had a phone line, a phone number and was very happy. Only now it's been taken away without any reason BT can fathom out, do I realise just how happy I was until they cut me off.

Aren't BT wonderful

2008-11-09T09:16:00.004Z

BT have just agreed to reconnect my home phone for free!

They can't explain why they took it upon themselves to disconnect it in the first place, but the weekend without a phone does at least mean I can get some work done without distraction.

Good old BT. Perhaps all the utlities providers could give us quality time by disconnecting their services for a few days at a time. I'll stock up on candles and buy a wind up gramaphone so I'm ready for when they do.

Of Time and City

2008-11-02T10:15:00.002Z

In my view the best film I've seen in a decade, this autobiographical account of Liverpool by Terence Davies is amazing. It blends old film footage with a very clever narrative to create a moving account of life, prejudice, behaviour and social engineering over the past 50yrs.

See a clip here.

Davies has only made four films . . . now I must see the other three!

Should all world leaders be left handed?

2008-11-02T08:57:00.004Z

I've been steering clear of American politics so have only just realised that the candidate for common sense is left handed. I'm hugely reassured.

As well as cancelling World War 3 and encouraging his country to be, well democratic in every sense of the word, he is left handed. This is not unique and he would be I think the USA's seventh left handed president, but perhaps he'll be the first one to seek equal rights for left handed people.

In a world where everything is adapted for people who are different in terms of ability, race, gender, sexual preference, faith, ethnicity and just about everything else, no concessions are made for left handed people. Everything you touch or use has been configured for a right handed person. It's a bloody nuisance and I'm sure contravenes some human right somewhere . . . . . .

Could this man make you laugh?

2008-10-31T15:44:00.002Z

I was at an awards evening in London last night. Former MP David Mellor QC was the after dinner speaker.

What I was expecting was an entertaining account of some of the seamier (and widely publicised) episodes in his life. Instead he told jokes - few of which I think he'd written himself.

It was as if he was trying too hard to be an 'after dinner speaker' and give people what he though they might be expecting. He should simply have been himself . . . . . in my view.

In many ways his lacklustre performance was just what I needed to witness. It's so reassuring to find that even those much further up the professional speaking ladder than me have off days and get it wrong.

Our daughter's flown the nest

2008-10-27T11:43:00.003Z

Ruth, our daughter has just landed in Addis Ababa after an overnight flight from London. She's working for at least a year for The Malaria Consortium as an intern, having completed her MSc at the London School of Hygiene this summer.

She emailed from her office to say that a) she had arrived, b) the coffee's excellent and c) she arrived to find her name was on her office door - a lovely touch.

We're planning to visit her there early next year and I for one can't wait to explore Ethiopia. I'm already wondering what happens there on an entrepreneurial nature and if it's going to be possible to combine holiday and work. I've come close to visiting Nigeria a couple of times and Africa and its economic challenges and opportunities fascinate me.

I guess it's inevitable that my travels now will be focused on visiting the kids . . . . yet another sign that middle age has arrived!

Bodyworlds is back!

2008-10-24T08:40:00.003+01:00

As a signed up body donor I got an invitation to the pre-view of the new Bodyworlds exhibition at O2. The show opens today and runs for several months. It's well worth a visit.

We walked round behind a couple of journalists from the Evening Standard. One was telling the other that the bodies were all 'Ukranian mental patients'. I had to but in and point out that he was wrong.

There are now 104 UK body donors (my daughter Ruth is the latest) who can see lots of merit in being recycled as an exhibit/teaching aid after death. The alternatives, burial or cremation seem to be rather wasteful.

The exhibition had several old favourites, the pregnant lady, a muscular athlete and lots of smokers' lungs. There were some exciting new exhibits too, the most striking of which is a giraffe.

Gunter was in fine form and we caught up on each others' news before he was dragged off for yet another press interview.

It's such a shame that controversy and misconception constantly shadow this man. He is simply following his personal vision of making anatomy and good health education accessible to all. One day I'll join him at an exhibition where we'll both be on display. Providing it's not for another 30yrs, I'm happy with that. It certainly beats rotting in a cemetery!

Bandits approaching the next roundabout

2008-10-24T08:33:00.002+01:00

I was in London with my daughter Ruth yesterday and we visited the Cold War exhibition at the V&A.

The most exciting exhibit was a Messerschmitt KR200 just like this one. Understandably there was little demand for fighter planes in Germany after the war and so the remaining stock of cockpit canopies were used to make these wonderful bubble cars.

Ruth could not believe that people really used to drive them. I had to explain that to graduate to a bubble car from motorbike and sidecar was a huge advance in comfort and convenience.

If you're in London, the exhibition is fantastic. It runs until the end of Jan and costs just £9.00 to get in. For those in their 20s, it's a revelation about how us baby boomers lived. For those in their 50s, it's pure nostalgia.

Where was Lady Penelope?

2008-10-24T08:25:00.004+01:00

I spent last weekend on Lanzarote speaking at a travel trade conference.

It was my first visit to the island so I had no idea what to expect. Of course I'd read that it's volcanic, but little could have prepared me for what I found. The place is totally surreal and reminded me instantly (and constantly) of Tracey Island, home of Thunderbirds.

Our hotel had a pool just like the Traceys' and I was convinced that at any moment we'd see TB1 emerge from underneath.

If you've not visited Lanzarote let me tell you it's perfect if you want to eat fish, lay in the sun and drink cocktails by the pool. If you want history, culture, greenery then it's not your place.

There's miles and miles of lava fields, volcanic peaks, and scruffy vines growing in the lave behind lava-rock windbreaks. There are also plenty of places you can eat an full English breakfast for just three euros, watch Sky Sport over a pint of Stella or simply strut along the prom, showing off your beer gut and tattoos. Having neither of these I felt rather conspicuous.

It was a great conference though and once you'd retreated into the darkened, air conditioned conference room, you could have been anywhere - even Birmingham!

Simple pleasures

2008-10-14T08:55:00.003+01:00

I spent Sunday afternoon fetching a load of horse manure for my garden. I have an arrangement with Julie who keeps horses and lives about three miles away. She makes a muck heap, rings me up and I go and collect it.

It's a great chance to take my tractor out for a drive and to use the front loader and tipping trailer. My tractor was built in 1963 and this summer benefitted from a complete engine overhaul. (I have still not owned up to what it cost!) I also have a five foot grass cutter for it which provides further opportunities to play with it.

I first drove this model, a Fordson Super Dexta, when I was 16 and have been driving them on and off ever since. It is pure nostalgia. All the chaps driving big modern tractors on the fields I pass give me a wave. I know they'd really like to swap places.

On this trip, I passed another Dexta on the road. This one had a plough on and had been re-sprayed as well as restored. Proof that I'm not the only guy who invests vast amounts in keeping 45yr old tractor on the road.

Mental Health Week

2008-10-12T18:53:00.004+01:00

Last week was World Mental Health week. This was appropriate for me as my depression 'black dog' bit my arse hard and refused to let go. I started waking at 3am and then when I got up later, feeling like life was not something I wanted to continue.

The tension and arguement between the rational and the suicidal continued in my head all week. What broke the spell and released me was a dinner on Friday night.

TV and radio personality Helen McDermott was guest speaker and I was MC. The event was a celebration of mental health charity Meridian East's 25th anniversary and the retirement of my friend Alan it's founder.

Helen talked about her own 'coming out' as someone with wavering mental health. She described in her talk so many of the things I experience that it was clear that how I feel is not unique. The evening, the wine, the conversation and the chance to further hone my presentation skills all helped.

Today I feel fine again. Which is just as well, as I'm facing a very busy week

Ever been thrown out of a cafe?

2008-10-09T08:38:00.002+01:00

I was last week, from this place in Spitalfields. It was one of my favourite haunts, just five minutes walk from Liverpool Street. A really creative space to talk, drink coffee eat cake and if they're not too busy, whip out my laptop and spend an hour writing on my current book.

All this changed when I suggested it as the perfect venue for Korean film journalist Soo Kim to interview me. As soon as she set her camera up, clipped a mike to my shirt and started filming, we were ejected. The owner told us in no uncertain terms that he doesn't allow filming in his cafe.

Now I would have though that all publicity is good publicity and that even a square metre of his cafe wall, behind my head, on TV in Seoul would be better than a poke in the eye. Clearly not.

We had to decamp and move from a delightful (once friendly) place with character to a modern, soulless cafe just over the road.

I'd love to know why we were really thrown out. Surely no one can be that publicity shy?

I went to church yesterday

2008-08-29T10:07:00.002+01:00

As a devout atheist, going to church is not something I regularly do, but yesterday was an exception.

I had a very pleasant lunch with the author Ronald Blythe. He's a lovely man who is still working, despite being in his mid 80s. I can learn so much from him about writing, England and life. He is a delight to be with.

After lunch we went for a walk. He took me to Wiston Church, which was build in 1135 and sits in the grounds of the local Hall. (He explained that churches were build next to the Hall, with the villages evolving later) Ronnie told me how he used to visit this church as a boy, and now comes here to preach.

On the wall is a painting of St Francis of Assisi. Ronnie explained how this was created around 20 years after St Francis died, so in about 1240. That's an awfully long time ago. How did the story of St Francis travel to this quoet corner of Essex? There was no internet, no Ryan Air and in fact nothing much at all - yet people travelled far and wide.

To be confronted with the past when you're rushing headlong through the present is so important. It puts your life in context - it reminds you how insignificant each of us really is!

Retirement - rude word or something to shoot for?

2008-08-28T09:02:00.003+01:00

I had a conversation yesterday with someone younger than me. He's a successful, professional fundraiser at the peak of his career.

We talked about our plans for the coming year and beyond. I'm starting a new business (a social enterprise publisher) and he's got the kind of heavy workload that people with a great reputation in their field always collect.

What bothered me was his announcement that he intended to retire somewhere between the ages of 50 and 55. He must be younger than I thought!

I was 53 on Friday and so am in the middle of his 'retirement zone.' When he is my age, he wants to stop working. I on the other hand am still trying to work out what I want to really do when I grow up!

Retirement as our parents knew it is not an option for many any more and thank goodness for that. The idea of deciding one day to stop working, stop earning and most of all, stop contributing to the world seems ghastly to me.

Today I'm off to meet author Ronald Blythe for lunch. He's best known for his book 'Akenfield', published more than 30yrs ago. He's still writing now, at the age of 85. Like me, he has not time for retirement, more the gradual change of lifestyle from' full on/flat out' to something more relaxed and perhaps introspective.

To me, retirement is a rude word . . . . !

The snip

2008-06-17T08:35:00.003+01:00

I was fortunate to meet Kerry Whybrow last year. Kerry is one of the people I interviewed for my book about prejudice, 'I Know Someone Like That', which will be published early in October.

Kerry was born a man and has led a fascinating, at times tragic life. Unlike so many transgender people, she is quite happy to speak out and seek publicity if it helps challenge people to understand the increadible journey she and many others feel compelled to make.

I spoke to her this morning. She's in Charing Cross Hospital and as of yesterday is now physically a woman too. Never slow in coming forward, she described her surgery to me in great detail, proudly telling me that she is now very well equipped to satisfy any man who comes into her life.

People often accuse me of 'collecting' unusual people. I don't think that's strictly true. What I can admit to is a fascination with people who have the courage to be themselves in the face of opposition. They can be entrepreneurs, activists or in the case of Kerry, people who take the largest steps to become the person they truly want to be.

I learn so much from people like Kerry. They help me realise how important it is to be yourself, whatever others might say.

You know when your kids are truly adult when . .

2008-06-07T08:09:00.002+01:00

. . . they decide to make journeys you're not sure you'd enjoy yourself!

Both of our kids are currently preparing for 'advanced foreign travel' by subjecting themselves to spooky vaccination programmes. I hate needles and so theprospect of protecting myself from rabies, yellow fever and all the other nasty diseases that seem to be lurking around outside Europe would not be something I'd enjoy.

However, when you're in your early 20s and determined to see something of the world, it's perhaps no big deal. This summer sees our son Tom driving to Mongolia with three friends in an old Land Rover and our daughter Ruth working in Uganda on a malaria project.

As we enjoy a quiet summer in Norfolk, with a week in La Rochelle to break the routine, two rather alarming thoughts keeps coming back to me. First, my kids are grown up and braver than me. Second, middle age seems to have arrived unnoticed!

Oh dear . . .

Living Library

2008-06-01T10:47:00.006+01:00

Yesterday I spent five hours in the library at Whitechapel being a 'living library book'.

Along with some 20 other people, I was there to represent a prejudice that others might have and feel moved to explore to me. I was there as a Bodyworlds body donor, someone who has signed up to a deal that will see my corpse plastinated, posed and put on public display when I die. Others represented homelessness, humanism, trans-gender, a medium and many, many more.

I was most affected myself by meeting Vikki Lucas. I spent all day plucking up the courage to recognise what was clearly a hang up about appearance. I was dying to ask Vikki lots, but we ended up just chatting. The thing is, she doesn't see her appearance (a rare genetic condition) as a problem - it's simply the way she is. My perceptions of how it must affect her, were my problem and for me to deal with.

I went to help people visiting the library understand me, but ended up being challenged myself. Meeting Vikki and realising that she's just an ordinary person with an unusual face was somehow deeply significant. Do I really judge people by how they look? Am I prejudiced? Curious? Drawn to the extreme? And if so, why?

The beach and a day of quiet contemplation beckons . . . .

Spinning hits Norfolk

2008-05-19T08:01:00.004+01:00

Years after everyone else, my local gym has bought a batch of reconditioned spinning bikes and launched some super Sunday morning classes.

It's supposed to be brilliant for runners so I signed up - to find I'm the only bloke doing it, so there's the added bonus of being surrounded by red faced women!

Yesterday, there was a perma-tanned, false nailed, heavily made up, blonde 40+yr old at the spinning class on Sunday - pretty gruesome for a Sunday morning - (well, she didn't do anything for me!) Although the rest of us were dripping sweat, her mascara didn't even run . . so either she's supremely fit or she kept the resistance on the bike to a minimum . . . perhaps I should try that too (cheating that is, not mascara!)

A difficult decision

2008-05-14T18:11:00.005+01:00

Isn't it strange how a harmless oversight can lead to a massive conundrum? I popped into the gym today, on my way to a meet a senior public sector manager. My thinking was that a hard run on the treadmill would be brilliant preparation for the meeting.

But then things took a turn for the worse.

After chucking my sweaty stuff in my gym bag and enjoying a log hot shower, I found that I had packed a pair of my wife's knickers instead of my own more modest underwear. What should I do? There was no time to go home for a pair. I could wear my sweaty ones - not nice; go without - not comfortable; or wear my wife's knickers and hope I'm not in an accident and rushed to hospital.

Of course the risk of being exposed in A&E as a temporary cross-dresser was extremely slim. I am a careful driver and why should today be the day I get unlucky and end up on a stretcher. Logic said pop them on and laugh it off at bed time when she spots her underwear clinging to my bum.

I couldn't do it . . . . . so opted to manage without.

What would you have done?

Do you follow or fight desire lines?

2008-04-19T18:34:00.004+01:00

I've become fascinated by 'desire lines'. These are the paths that people create by walking where they choose, rather than where the planners intended.

When confronted by desire lines, you have too choices. Adapt to meet the demand or enforce a change of behaviour. In other words, make a path where people walk or use barbed wire to deter them. Which of these would you do?

Businesses are always encountering 'virtual desire lines'. These are those annoying instances where the customers don't behave as you expect. The successful entrepreneur recognises sees these as opportunities and responds accordingly. The fool takes it as a snub, erects 'barbed wire' and loses customers.

Once you start to think about desire lines you see them everywhere. What's more you will probably feel liberated enough to create some of your own!

Good luck

Why do we worry about the wrong things?

2008-04-14T08:45:00.005+01:00

This is a picture of George Derbyshire. He's a super bloke who runs the National Federation of Enterprise Agencies. He also has a rather impressive beard. George and I both attended a conference last week and I could not help but compare his established facial growth with my own, rather newer version. In any competition, George would beat me hands down.

But only after accepting that I had grown a rather inferior version, did it strike me that on top, I have a full head of hair and George has gone bald. In other words, if you compare our whole heads and not just our faces, I've got more hair than he has.

This set me thinking. Why did I beat myself up about my less dense beard when actually I'm better off overall? What other examples are there in life where I and perhaps you, compare just one facet of ourselves that we're sensitive about and ignore the fact that in other respects, we're actually better off?

My conclusion is this: when you start comparing your performance with that of those around you, step back and take a wider view. You might be pleasantly surprised to find that when you stop focusing on detail, you find that you're actually better off than you first thought!

Atlas Shrugged - more than a good read!

2008-04-03T08:07:00.002+01:00

I was introduced to 'Atlas Shrugged' by a millionaire who told me it's the only book he ever read twice. I now know why!

The book is a compelling read and the parallels with today's focus on political correctness and positive discrimination tells me that we're in great danger in the UK today of living out the book with all of it's dire consequences. Only yesterday I heard a senior NHS manager apologise for appointing a man rather than a women to an all male Board. 'The man was the best candidate,' she said, 'but if both had been equal, we'd have appointed the woman.'

We also have the National Union of Teachers calling for the nationalisation of Britain's private schools because it's not fair that the kids there stand a better chance.

I lead an anti-stigma project and also provide 'business support' to UK charities seeking to develop social enterprise. I know the paradox of equality, that is: the more you seek to include and be fair, the more you actually highlight the differences and exclude.

Atlas Shrugged ends with the lights going out in New York. Let's not let that happen in London!

There is now a website to explore; take a look! http://www.atlasshrugged.com/

Stuffing Stigma

2008-03-20T08:41:00.003Z

I led a successful bid for Lottery funds to continue an anti-stigma campaign I launched last year. It's part of the Rethink/Mind/Mental Health Media 'Moving People' project and will I hope form an innovative, Norwich based link in that bigger 3yr campaign.

As is always the case when it's my initiative that has led to something happening, the process of 'letting go' as others become involved is painful. I'm very good at seeing opportunities and grabbing them. I then become very protective and finally, recognise that actually the project has to become what others feel it should become.

The challenge for me always comes at that point when others can clearly see that what is actually needed is a little less extreme and revolutionary than what I've been advocating. (I exaggerate for effect - always - then become entranced by the opportunity to surprise!).

Chatting with the Chairman of our local Mental Health Trust yesterday, over a milky Starbucks coffee, it became very clear that Stuff Stigma now had to become less maverick and more mainstream. The imminent appointment of a Stuff Stigma Project Manager also suggests that soon it will be time for me to slip from 'activist' to 'mentor' role - stepping back and supporting someone else who will be having all the fun of changing public attitudes to mental ill health.

Perhaps it's my age, but I find I'm becoming much more comfortable with the model I've developed. It works like this:

1. See a gap or opportunity
2. Challenge, provoke, irritate and eventually get something happening
3. Involve those who work in the same 'space' as the project I'm incubating
4. Invite those showing an interest to shape the project and align it with their own
5. Step back and then out, to do it all again somewhere else

As far as Stuff Stigma goes, I'm going to be very involved in some of the outward facing elements of the project. Specifically annual conferences, mass participation events and a book I'm writing about prejudice.

The 2008 conference focuses on empathy and how to do it . . . it's on Mowww.stuffstigma.org ay 31st March and you can book your place via www.stuffstigma.org

It's free to attend and will be fun - I promise

See you there!

A chav for two days

2008-02-29T08:24:00.003Z

One of the benefits of driving a Nissan X Trail is the car you get to borrow when yours is in for a service.

Yesterday I swapped my sleek, sophisticated X Trail for the ultimate chavombile, complete with chucky roof bars, running boards and a back seat, convenient for servicing firm breasted blonde hitchhikers.

It's a motor that had me fighting the urge to blow £10 at Argos on a gold bracelet and chest medallion. It's also a motor that did not meet the approval of the lovely young lady on the security barrier at Norfolk County Council.

She was clearly the kind of person who would normally swoon at the site of a tanned, muscular chap like me arriving in the ultimate fun 4x4, but somehow the charm opportunity passed her by.

'The car park's full,' she said, 'you'll have to go away again.' This was somewhat inconvenient as three people were waiting for me inside the building for some high-powered negotiations. I had to ring them from the roadside and explain that short of parking on a double yellow line on the main road outside, they'd have to re-schedule the meeting and find a venue that allowed visitors to park.

Rather like the car, her willingness to screw up the Council's business by turning away visitors with important meetings, left me speechless.

The three folks I was to meet are now scheduled to come here in a few days time. I'm tempted to give my PA a high-vis jacket and clipboard and have her turn them away at the top of the drive, 'as our car park is full'. That however would be rude and unlike Councils, I don't do rude.

Just because it's there . .

2008-02-19T09:43:00.003Z

I try to challenge every convention, if only to explore the fringes of normal behaviour. However, when given a tray of food on a plane on Sunday afternoon I ate it without really thinking. Yes, I was a litte hungry, but sausage and mash in a plastic tray at 35,000 feet does little to stimulate the appetite. I followed the herd.

12 hours later I realised the mistake I'd made. Food poisoning is not nice and having one toilet and the urgent need to both sit on it and lean over it at the same time is even worse.

Now, 36 hours later I am beginning to recover. To eat again and feel as if I might manage to live beyond the weekend.

Of course the airline will say it's pure coincidence and perhaps it is. It might have been something else that struck my wife and I that night, even though I very much doubt it.

My lingering question is this: why do we expect a 'proper' meal on a plane when actually, a few museli bars or similar would bridge the gap, not fill the plane with awful food smells and be a lot easier to store and serve hygienically.

Health vs Wealth

2008-02-19T09:39:00.000Z

I’ve just come back from a week in Morocco. Part of the holiday involved a two day guided trek through the mountains with our luggage aboard Nellie the mule; (a strange name for a Moroccan mule, perhaps more for our benefit than the mule!)

We stopped overnight in a remote Berber village. The houses were made of earth, there was one light-bulb hanging from the ceiling of each room, no heating and the only washing facilities were the small tap on the wall beside the squatter toilet; even when given its morning rinse with water from the stream, this was not a nice place to linger.

Dinner was a tasty tagine, filled with fatty lamb and vegetables. The bread was unleavened and everyone dipped into the food with their fingers; there were no plates, knives or forks. Afterwards I slept fully clothed (it was cold) under a couple of heavy blankets.

At first appearance, this way of life is primitive if not squalid. The family we stayed with did have a TV in one of their rooms and also a Nokia phone, to save the stroll down the earthen track to the shop where there was a payphone. What struck me above all else was that the people here were extraordinarily content.

TV and the occasional trekking tourist clearly illustrated the material comforts of life in nearby Marrakech and beyond. Teenagers here wore jeans, T-shirts and if they were lucky trainers too. The basics of life that I take for granted, central heating, power-shower, dishwasher etc were totally lacking. The washing machine was a bucket and board on the roof of the house. Others did their laundry in the stream that ran through the village.

Our guide Abdou summed up the philosophy of the place. He sees overweight, unfit Europeans almost every week of the year as he introduces them to his traditional way of life. He said that all the material wealth in the world was of no value if you were not healthy. People here don’t drink and few smoke. They go to bed soon after dark and get up early to work at their self sufficient lifestyle. In their villages of 3-400 people, they know and respect all of their neighbours. People have time to talk and as we walked, everybody we passed stopped for a chat. Contrast this with Holborn tube station at 10am on a Monday morning, when people spew forth in their thousands onto Kinsgway like wet cement out of a pipe; grey, cold and miserable.

Who has the best life? The London commuter or the Berber who only strays from his village once a week to go to the market in his nearby town? Whose life most closely matches that for which we are best suited, physically and psychologically? Who complains the most about his lot? Who takes the most Prozac?

Like you, I don’t want to give up every material comfort to live a basic, back to nature, existence. That’s too big a step to take. However, I return to the UK determined to seek greater simplicity and to listen more closely to my instinct. Simple is good and striving for more ‘stuff’ does little for your long term health.

Buy a slice of me for your living room wall!

2008-02-07T08:18:00.000Z

According to 'The Times' earlier this week plastination supremo Gunther von Hagens is planning to sell resin mounted slices of his body donors to the general public. He rightly pointed out in the interview that if you tired of your novel artwork, it would be appropriate to have it cremated and not chuck it in your black bin. After all, whoever heard of disposing of the dead by burying them!

He later told the media that this was a misquote, but not before the Bishop of Manchester got hot under his dog-collar and protested loudly about the Bodyworlds exhibition about to open in his city.

I've got to know von Hagens reasonably well over the five years since I signed up with him as a body donor. I have also accompanied him to his factory in China and watched his team of highly skilled anatomists preparing donated bodies for display.

I don't for a moment really think he plans to sell body parts to the general public. But if he did, would it really matter? If in 50 years time someone could entertain their friends and shock the postman by fitting my preserved right arm as a door-knocker, then who am I to worry?

Given the choice between cremation, burial or being recycled as a teaching aid or even as works of art, the latter is surely the most appealing. It makes such sense to be able to continue to contribute to society in a positive way long after your death.

You can join me by signing up here!

SAGA SCAN - Is there something I don't know?

2008-01-31T13:32:00.000Z

Today's post revealed a tastefully assembled, personally addressed invitation from SAGA to enjoy being CT scanned at the bargain (but only if I book within two weeks) price of £530.

A list of possible reasons for taking this bold step is thoughtfully included. Three of the eight reasons apply to me. I have a family history of poor health (well early death actually), I suffer from stress and drink alcohol - and of course I'm over 50, otherwise they'd not have mailed me in the first place.

This all suggests that I've already got one foot in the grave and who knows, a CT Scan might help me predict when the other foot will follow.

SAGA are good at helping the over 50s feel their age. However, as I'm currently training for the London Marathon, manage my stress pretty well and rarely drink more than two glasses (OK large glasses) of red wine a night, it might be safe to keep the £530 and invest it in something else. Some red wine perhaps!

Now if the hospital gave you a CD with images of your guts, brain and breakfast that you could have printed out and mounted on the wall, I'd be there like a shot. It'd be rather cool to have a 3d image my brain peering down at me from the wall.

Always start with something familiar

2008-01-30T09:01:00.000Z

I attended a meeting of the excellent 'Norfolk Network' last night; something I really should do more often. The speaker was Ben Finn, who with his twin brother created Sibelius software. They then sold the company in 2006 for £13m. No surprise that he was a very relaxed speaker!

I'd heard a number of composers I know talk about Sibelius software and knew that it was used by some of the very best (John Rutter for example). What I had struggled with was to really understand what it did.

Ben started his presentation by describing his product as 'word processing for music'. It was at that point that the penny dropped and I realised what it was really all about. He went on to talk about the functionality of the product in terms I could readily translate into Word functionality. (Furthermore, just as you can convert voice to Word with some software, so too with Sibelius can you input with both kinds of keyboard - either the one with letters and number or the one with musical keys!)

The message I share with you from that evening is this: when describing anything new, your starting point has to be something familiar!

I've overcome a major inhibition

2008-01-22T13:09:00.000Z

One of my failings is that I think too much. I delve too deeply into things that frankly are not that important. My brain races round, consuming valuable processing power in trivia.

That said, sometimes this deep thinking helps me banish a spook. This time, I've overcome my anxieties about my beard. Basically I've grown one!

I always thought this was something I'd not be manly enough to achieve and so, apart from a rather sad moustache a few years ago, have always been clean if not recently shaven.

Now I have what started out as designer stubble and has grown - in fact it's taking a life of its own and I can't stop admiring myself in shop windows - much to the amusement of shop workers!

What's really helped me over the inhibition is that someone I know who gets 5 o'clock shadow before breakfast has just given up growing a beard as he said it was too dense and bushy.

Yippee I think, so here is yet another example of the Goldilocks Theory. That is: you can have too little, too much or find that actually what you've got is just right!

Marathon build up

2008-01-13T10:41:00.000Z

I'm running the London Marathon this April. It's my second time and this year, I plan to be better prepared for those 26.2 miles. It's fair to say that last time (2006) I was not nearly as fit as I am now. It took me 5hrs18mins to complete the course.

James my trainer has written my training schedule on my office whiteboard and it looks daunting. I'll be running at least 22 miles a week between now and April. Some long runs, some short fast ones, plus of course a couple of trips to the gym to work on my core body strength and do some weights.

I'll be raising money for Rethink, the mental health charity. I Chair a regional group for them and see first hand the huge positive impact they have on people living with poor mental health and their families. You can sponsor me here if you would like to help!

There must be something in me that makes me take on these crazy challenges!

Waves of enthusiasm

2008-01-02T10:22:00.000Z

It's 1030 on the first morning that most people are back at work. My inbox is pinging with invitations to avail myself of countless opportunities. Some are obvious, others obscure. All are intended to get someone else's New Year off to a promising start!

What is clear is that after a week or more of self indulgence and expense, many people are anxious about their ability to earn the money they need to make 2008 a success - in their terms. Of course for those of us who are self employed, January is also the month in which we have to pay HMRC a wad of tax and in my case, it's also the month I pay over all that VAT that has been sitting in my bank account creating a false sense of financial security!

My plan is to let these waves of enthusiasm wash over me. I know where I'm heading and do not want to be distracted by others who see me as a 'hot prospect' for their New Year sales drive. Furthermore I am not going to leap into the fray myself. I've enough on this month without adding to the workload by chasing wild geese!

Good health is everything

2007-12-31T10:29:00.000Z

I've spent the last week with a cold. Not any cold, but a totally debilitiating, wearing, crippling cold of the kind only men seem to get. Everything is too much effort. I don't know where the Christmas holiday went - but wherever it was, I didn't notice!

The fog of illness is clearing slowly which prompts me to reflect on the way our health shapes our perception. I run and am a frequent, disciplined gym attender. This week though, running and exercise have been off my agenda and even the smallest task has seemed too much.

What's terrifying is that this must be how old age feels. Something to look forward to!

Do you remember Akenfield?

2007-12-11T09:38:00.000Z

I had the pleasure of buying Ronald Blythe lunch yesterday. He wrote Akenfield in 1969, an iconic work that gave a unique insight into rural Suffolk life. He has written widely on social history and is one of the inspirations behind a book I'm currently researching. (A collective biography that explores how 50 people's lives have been shaped by the prejudices of others)

He's still writing and remarkably fit at 85. In fact he has clearly decided that old age and retirement are for other people, not him. ('Painters and writers never retire,' he told me.)

It struck me as I drove home afterwards that retirement is one of those things we are all encouraged to aim for, yet if you love your work, stopping to spend 20yrs reading the paper and watching daytime TV in an increasing state of poverty is not an ambition worth aspiring too.

Meeting Ronnie Blythe reassured me that potentially I still have 30 years of my writing career left. Now that is something to look forward to!